"It's not the pain you are suffering from so much. It's that your regular life keeps shrinking"
"There is no point in treating chronic pain because if treatment seems to work the pain probably would have gone away on it's own" (Imagine them saying this for any other kind of illness)
"Here, read this book about how the pain is all in your mind"
"Let's not paper over things by giving you meds, let's just wait a few more months"
"There is not enough research. I could treat you but I'm a very conservative guy. I say let's wait another 18 months and see what data comes in."
"Sure I could relieve your pain, but what's the point? If it was meant to go away it will go away, if not, it won't"
"If you were some regular guy that only had one pain and liked to watch hockey, you'd be easier to treat"
"Sure, travel across the country and I'll have a look at you (you do and show up for an appointment). Beat's me!"
"I think the problem was caused by the treatment you undertook two years after the problem started." - Mayo Clinic "expert".
"Have you tried Tai Chi?"
"You should try mindfulness meditation" - to which I responded that I'd been practicing that for decades "That's impossible, mindfulness meditation is new" - to which I responded "Buddhism is new?"
"Yes ,we advertise that service but I don't think it works so we won't give it to you"
"All your evidence for X treatment is composed of case studies. What I need to convince me to treat you is multiple large double blind studies."
"Don't bother making another appointment"
"Have you tried (insert flaky, non-scientific, dis-proven therapy here)?"
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